Friday, August 28, 2009

Malaysian Ah Long Vs The Police

Shared by my colleague Jonathan.


THE COPS

THE AH LONGS

SLOGAN

"Mesra, Cepat & Betul"

"Mesra, Jika Cepat Bayar"

TEAM SIZE

89,197

3,403

HIGHEST RANK

IGP, Tan Sri

Tai Kor, Datuk

LOWEST RANK

Constable

Mah Chai

RANK ID

Pips On Uniform

Tattoos On Body

HOME GROUND

Bukit Aman

Bukit Bintang

FIREPOWER

Revolver, Semi Automatic

Meat Cleaver, Molotov Cocktail

STANDARD ISSUE

Hand Cuffs

Knuckle Duster

AFFLIATION

Interpol

Intertriad

SQUAD CAR

Proton Wira, Waja, Perodua Kancil

Proton Aeroback (With Extended Spoiler)

WANTED LIST

Displayed At Stations, Published In Papers

Displayed On Lamp Posts, Phone Booths

COMMUNICATION

Encrypted Wireless Network

Random Pre-Paid Cellphones

SPECIAL SKILLS

Surveillance, Investigation, Interception

Stake-Out, Ambush, Bone Re-Structuring

CROWD CONTROL

Water Cannon, Dog Unit

Fire Bomb, Killer Bees

BACK-UP

PVR, RELA

Car Repossessors, Club Bouncers

RECENT WIN

Stopped Siti Nurhaliza Hate Mails

Financed Euro 2004 Betting Activities

RECENT DEFEAT

Lost 1 Police Station To A Food Court

Missed 1 Food Court Financing Opportunity

RECRUITMENT

Via Mass Media

Via Friend Of A Friend Of A Friend

DISLIKES

ACA, Lawyers

MCA, Lawyers

FAV MOVIES

Police Story 1 - 5, Serpico

Jaws, Loan Shark, Mean Streets

FAV QUOTE

"Tengok Tengki?"

"Macam Mana Mau Settle?"

FAN CLUB

Rakan COP

Rakan TELCO

1 comment:

Jonathan Nathan said...

Wow! I was actually mentioned in your blog :P